WHO SAYS THAT COPS DON'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR?

"Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

"Take your hands off the car, or I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

"Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

"So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh .... did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

"Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop."

"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

"In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

"Just how big were those two beers?"

"No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

"I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

"You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."

 While browsing around random blogs here on t-blog, I found a very interesting story on Drthalamo's blog. http://drthalamo.tblog.com/" title="http://drthalamo.tblog.com/" target="_blank"http://drthalamo.tblog.com/ It was a story on Popular Science's site  http://www.popsci.com/popsci/science/articl e/0" title="http://www.popsci.com/popsci/science/articl e/0" target="_blank"http://www.popsci.com/popsci/...,12543,676853,00.html about a new invention some call "Smart Skin," and others are calling "Metal Rubber."

the story:

"Terrible, horrible things can be done to this millimeters-thick patch of shimmering material crafted by chemists at NanoSonic in Blacksburg, Virginia. Twist it, stretch it double, fry it to 200°C, douse it with jet fuel—the stuff survives. After the torment, it snaps like rubber back to its original shape, all the while conducting electricity like solid metal. “Any other material would lose its conductivity,” says Jennifer Hoyt Lalli, NanoSonic’s director of nanocomposites.

The abused substance is called Metal Rubber, and, according to NanoSonic, its particular properties make it unique in the world of material chemistry. As a result, the company’s small office has been flooded with calls from Fortune 500 companies and government agencies eager to test Metal Rubber’s use in everything from artificial muscles to smart clothes to shape-shifting airplane wings.

At this stage, however, NanoSonic is busy meeting the demand for its 12-inch-by-12-inch samples, which take custom-built robots up to three days to create. That’s speedy, if you consider that Metal Rubber, a product of nanotechnology, must be fabricated molecule by molecule.

The manufacturing process, called electrostatic self-assembly, starts with two buckets of water-based solutions—one filled with positively charged metallic ions, the other with oppositely charged elastic polymers. The robot dips a charged substrate (glass, for example) alternately from one bucket to the next. The dipping slowly builds up tight, organized layers of molecules, bonded firmly by opposing charges. Afterward the substrate is removed, leaving a freestanding sheet of Metal Rubber.

With investor interest booming, Metal Rubber could make its commercial debut within a year or so. Although shape-shifting aircraft wings and sensory robotic gloves are on the horizon, Metal Rubber will probably appear first in more humble, practical roles. Abuse-resistant flexible circuits and wires, for instance, could allow you to do terrible, horrible things to your portable electronics—consequence -free."

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Does this stuff sound familiar? How about the terms "Rosewell, NM" or "Area 51?" Still no clue? Then read this: http://www.csicop.org/si/9707/roswell.html" title="http://www.csicop.org/si/9707/roswell.html" target="_blank"http://www.csicop.org/si/9707...

This new material reminds me so much of the debris said to have been found at the crash site. The stuff "supposedly" found at the site (and later said to be wreckage of a weather balloon) had these very same characteristics.

Some people claim that alot of our technological advances came from the study of this wreckage. We might have. Who knows. Just look how far we've come in such a short time. I personally feel that this "new discovery" is just a bit more proof that something did happen that night in Rosewll, and that the Government has been covering it up this whole time.

What's your take on this?

Utilikilts

http://www.utilikilts.com" title="http://www.utilikilts.com" target="_blank"http://www.utilikilts.com

I'm actually thinking of buying one.

What's your opinion on these things?

Here's a few pics. http://www.utilikilts.com/photogal-index.htm" title="http://www.utilikilts.com/photogal-index.htm" target="_blank"http://www.utilikilts.com/pho...

Personally, I think the "shock value" alone would make it worth it. :P

I just read this in the www.bizarrenews.com newsletter.

Connecticut:  

In Hartford, it is illegal to educate a dog.  
  
It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.  

In New Britain, the speed limit for fire trucks is 25 m.p.h.,  
even when going to a fire.  


Delaware:  

Getting married on a dare is grounds for an annulment.  

It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is  
carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.  


Illinois:  

In Chicago, it is illegal to fish in one's pajamas.  

In Chicago, it is illegal to take a French poodle to the  
opera.  

According to state law, it is illegal to speak English. The  
officially recognized language is "American."  

In Gurnee, it is illegal for women weighing more than 200  
pounds to ride horses in shorts.  

In Joliet, it is illegal to mispronounce the name Joliet.  


Iowa:  

State law forbids any establishment from charging admission  
to see a one-armed piano player.  

In Fort Madison, firemen are required to practice for 15  
minutes before attending a fire.

Feel free to post any that you know of. ^_^

http://quizilla.com/users/SpiderLady/quiz zes/What" title="http://quizilla.com/users/SpiderLady/quiz zes/What" target="_blank"http://quizilla.com/users/Spi...%20Type%20of%20Evil%20Sup er%20Villain%20Would%20yo u%20be%3F%20

Femme Fatale/Playboy: If sex is a weapon, you are the most deadly assassin of all! Using a perfect combination of seduction, guile and wits, you spin webs of desire in the hearts of your targets with the greatest of ease. Few people can resist your charms, and it is only a matter of time before the unsuspecting reveal their secrets to you. Often underrated and
overlooked by a great many of your villainous brethren, you can, beneath the glitter and glamour, be a somewhat bitter thingbut you are also a master of using perceived weaknesses to your advantage, so it would do well for all around you to keep that in mind. You also have a talent for kicking butt in heels and short skirts / smoking jackets. Famous Comic Book Femme Fatales/Playboys include The White Queen, Catwoman, Purgatori, and Shinobi Shaw.

Somehow, I always knew this was true.